Generic baseline stuff
“I wish it need not have happened in my time,” said Frodo.
So do I,” said Gandalf, “and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”
– JRR Tolkien
Truer words have never been said…
After 13 years of service, Starbucks decided I was no longer needed, and I was part of the 1,100 who were laid off. In pop culture, the five stages of grief are typically stated as denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.
There really was no denial. The generic “Your role has been eliminated” left no room for denial. There was no “Could this be a mistake?” or “Is there another Eddie Wang?” It was easy to reach the conclusion: “Yeah, you are it.”
Anger is the clearest and most persistent stage. It is still an ongoing process for me to figure out if I should be angry at myself, management, or the company as a whole. There’s anger at being discarded, anger at the sudden change in company culture, and anger at myself for believing it was anything other than a profit-making vehicle.
There was no real bargaining stage, except for some discussions with colleagues over the question, “Would you ever go back?” and the even more depressing conclusion, “What are we even going back to?”
Depression is truly what this whole grieving process is about. Sadness is the one word that can sum up this entire experience so far. It’s as simple as that, and as complicated as that.
Acceptance is the destination stage of this process. I am not sure what that will be like. One day, if I find another job where I can continue my career with the same level of satisfaction and fulfillment, maybe I will be able to look back and accept what happened.
It took me a little bit of time to determine the title of this post. “Breakup” sounds overly dramatic, but it’s fitting because This American Life recently republished this all-time great story. The feelings are strangely similar. If you have never listened to it, do yourself a favor and download it. https://www.thisamericanlife.org/339/break-up
Finally, thinking back, what will I choose to remember about my time at Starbucks? I went through thousands of photos I have related to the time I have been with the company and decided to post the one above.
It was 2018, and I was in Shanghai to finish up one of my projects. It was also during the company party for the Chinese New Year, and there was a wall where partners could sign and write a message about the company.
For me, it was “peak Starbucks.” The Shanghai Roastery had just opened, and the company was fully engaged in the expansion and elevating the brand phase.
Professionally, I was taking on more of a leadership role, starting to represent teams with stakeholders. Most importantly, it was the time when I started to allow myself to think, “I am onto something. I can see myself ending my career here.” In a way, it was the beginning of the end.
This really isn’t the post I wanted to write, but I need to write it, just for myself. The post I was planning to write is still coming. It will be about my preparation for the Taiwan trip with Kai. That’s still happening, and in many ways, it couldn’t come at a better time.
It’s easy for you to say, ‘Oh, I wouldn’t have acted that way’, but you don’t know. That’s – that’s the truth. You don’t know. And now I know what I’m capable of, and it hurts. – Stanford Prison Experiment
Why don’t I have a choice? I came here on my own free will, I thought I could help in a research project. If I have to hurt somebody – if I was in his place – no – I can not continue. – Experimenter
You drop a bomb, and it falls on the just and the unjust. I don’t wish the culmination of three centuries of physics to be a weapon of mass destruction. – Oppenheimer
It’s the kind of movie that made me want to weep. How can we make so many wrong choices along the way and still ended up here? And how can we still make so many wrong choices knowing the consequences?
Okay, let’s face it, 2024 was a disaster. But instead of dwelling on the past, let’s look forward with a bit more optimism, shall we? (Maybe we’ll save the whole reflection thing for another post.)
We all know how the whole New Year’s resolution thing usually goes. We start off strong, full of good intentions… and then by February, those resolutions are a distant memory. (Apparently, a whopping 75% of people give up before the end of January! Yikes.)
But hey, there are actually some pretty smart strategies out there to help us break this cycle. Two ideas that caught my eye are:
So, given the ups and downs of this year (and let’s be real, the challenges ahead), I’m going to give these two approaches a shot.
Here’s my game plan for the next few weeks:
At the end of my little trial period, I’ll check in and see how it’s going. Wish me luck!
“The farmers want to end the famine but, aren’t willing to do a little blood magic to summon the rains. Some people don’t want to be helped!”
Blood magic? Why would I use blood magic?
Blood magic gets a bad rep ever since people figured out it might carry diseases…
And death, suffering and just general grossness!
But this is 2024 – all the blood we use were ethnically donated, checked and sanitized.
So you are taking away from people who might need the actual blood transfusion? Are you stealing from hospitals?
Not exactly… we have a hazardous material disposal contract and blood do expire, you know?
O.O
And we are not even using that much blood – for a region this size, maybe 50, 100 units max?
What? that’s the blood of 10 people!
5 to 10, I am just estimating here – and we are not using real people!
Can you promise me you are not hurting anyone innocent?
-.- well, we do need a soul too….
I finally plunk down the money for a four years deal – let’s see if it sticks this time.